Mother's Day Reflection, Thank You and Prayer

Motherhood is the greatest thing I have ever done and the hardest thing I have ever done. I have found it to be difficult yet rewarding. Exhausting yet renewing. It is messy and beautiful
 and at one moment I can doubt myself so much and in the next find my true self. 
Every day is new, everyday lends itself to growing and teaching and forgiving and loving. 
Motherhood is crazy.

Recently I have felt like a new Mom. With the number three has come change--some thrust upon me just because I am simply outnumbered--but some has come through prayer and purposeful thinking and through so many women who surround and inspire me. I have felt this shift in myself to not strive for perfection, but to strive for happiness in my home. A shift to go with the flow, to be truly thankful, to be honest and above all else, to put on love. 

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, meekness and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony. And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful.
Colossians 3:12-15

This is my verse people! When I think about what kind of mother I want to be and what I want my children's childhoods and adulthoods to look like, this is it. I want them to be compassionate and kind. I want to show them what patience and forgiveness looks like. I want to wake up in the morning and put on love and show it in everything I do.

All of this is super, crazy hard to do all of the time because I am human. A busy, mom-human. Every day I fail. Every. darn. day. But like the verse says, I am a chosen one. God chose this life for me. He chose me for them and them for me.  (That sentence makes me smile.) He chose Doug for me. Through our relationhsip we are trying to teach Emery, Auggie and Bennett to be understanding, softhearted and thankful. And God has hand-picked women in my life to be there when I need a laugh or words of affirmation or a reminder of all the gifts I have been given.They are my Mothers, my Grandmothers, my Sisters, the Godmothers to my children, my role-models, my friends.

I am so thankful for the women God has placed in my life.

Growing up, my Mom made sure we never ever went without. Whatever we needed, we got and now I realize she was the one that went without so many times. She put our needs first. And she still does this. I might mention something as simple as Emery needing new socks, and the next time she visits, she of course has new socks. She spoils all of us big time and her grandkids are her world. I don't know what we would do without her time and love. She is the best Nana.

If anyone ever tells you that they have the best Grandma, they are wrong. Because I do. 
I have always felt this way and now that I have my own children, I realize just how big her impact has been on my life. I am thankful for her faith and for her instilling in me how great our God is.  My Grandma helped shape me into the person I am today and I find myself telling Emery things that Grandma taught me when I was her age. My Grandma is tiny but has the biggest heart and loves with it fiercely.

I really do feel like Susie is my second mother. I remember when I went with Doug's parents to drop him off at the U of I and she cried all the way back to Eastern. She said she felt like she was leaving two kids that day, not just one. Secretly, I was going to miss her too (and I probably thought she was a little crazy haha). She is always there and will do absolutely anything for us. When something happens with the kids and Doug and I don't have the answer (which is just about always) you can bet we are on the phone to Sue. I am of course thankful for the son she raised too.

I am so thankful for all of my sisters-in-law. They are the first to scoop up one of my kids and love on them. They give us advice, act as sounding boards for frustration or ideas and have raised the perfect role models and friends for my kids. Speaking of aunts, my own Aunt Linda and Dora (even though she isn't my aunt but I count her as one) have been the source of so much fun, love and good food (they are the best cooks) in my life. Growing up I thought these two ladies knew everything. If you don't know something, call Aunt Linda and if she doesn't know, I bet Dora does. Nothing has really changed. I don't see them near enough but their love for me and my babies is never doubted.

And my friends. What would I do without them? My girlfriends are my prayer warriors, my cheerleaders, my role models, and my last minute babysitters. We have laughed together, cried together and supported each other through so many different situations. Some live too far away for my liking and some live just a mile through the woods. I love them and all of their babies and they love me and mine.

If I am making a Mother's Day thankful list, it would not be complete without Doug, Emery, Auggie and Bennett. 

Doug recently described me as devoted and it really meant a lot. Moms do a lot and so much goes unnoticed--thats just the way it is, but just knowing that he does notice gave me a little boost. Really, Doug does so much for us. I am so thankful for the husband and friend he is to me and for the father he is to my babies.

Emery, my firstborn and my only girl. I am thankful for her big heart and her sweet personality. She is an observer and so inquisitive and soaks up every word anyone says. She is a reminder that I am always setting an example. I am thankful for all she does for me....she is my biggest help. 

Auggie, my little sour-patch kid. I am so thankful for his unconditional love. He loves me big! And even though he pushes every button I have sometimes, he has taught me patience and forgiveness and he is a gift that I would never change.

And Bennett Lee. God knew I needed him. I am thankful for the easy baby that he is and how he has brought out the best in all of us. 

My prayer this Mother's Day for myself and for the Moms in my life:
Lord, I pray that you give me strength.I pray that whatever I am in need of that I come and lay it at your feet. If I am stressed may I remember that your grace is enough--for every season, tantrum, question and failure, it is always enough. Help me remember that I am wildly loved by you and I pray that you empower me to love my children in the same way. I pray that excitement fills my heart every morning and that I feel equipped to tackle every challenge and day with joy (even if I feel like giving up before 8 a.m.). I pray that at night I lay my head down with a smile on my face, a prayer of thanks on my lips and no regrets in my heart. I pray for patience and for forgiveness when I fail. I pray that this shift I have been feeling continues and that you help me to put on love everyday. 

And I pray for all of the amazing Mothers in my life. Empty-nest Mom, Expecting Mom, Mom of littles, Mom of bigs, Stay at Home Mom, Working Mom, Mom of sweet angels and Mom in waiting. I pray that whatever you are needing at this moment that God would whisper to you that he is there and that he hears you. I hope you find comfort in his promises and know that I am inspired by you and praying for you. And I love you!
Amen

~Happy Mother's Day and Thank You~