Where Did It Go?

As I get ready to tear off another month on my desk calendar, I wonder where March went. 

Do you ever do that? Wonder where a month goes? A week? An hour? I must be at the stage in my motherhood that people assume I am tired of the juggle. That I must be out there tossing pennies into the "Hurry Up Time" wishing-well. But they couldn't be more wrong. When an empty-nester at Aldi smiles at all my "helpers" and tells me to enjoy them, I hope she knows my "I am" is sincere. When a wrinkled hand pokes me on the shoulder at church and tells me that I have a beautiful family (after we have been quite the distraction for an hour),  I hope she knows that all the frustration I might have felt is softened into sweet longing for little hands to stay dimpled and for the head on my shoulder to stay right there a little longer. 

Motherhood is funny like that. Life is funny like that I guess. There is this push and pull between hurry up and stay right here. I want summer break, I want a 10 year old, I want to be diaper free. But I also want to fold footy pjs, I want to brush my daughters hair, I want to look down and see little hands reaching up to be held forever. 

March went by fast. Normally I look back through my pictures to see what all we did, but for the month of March, I have one. This one. It was taken on Doug's birthday. Notice the little boy in the background...if you could hear the picture it would be the word "poopingggg" being yelled by Theo while the rest of us giggle at the camera. The perfect family picture! Its silly little moments like these that make me want to stay right here. Stay in March. 

In March we celebrated Nana's birthday with bowling, Doug and I went to an Illini game, Auggie played in a 3 on 3 basketball tournament, Douglas traveled quite a bit, I went to a mom conference with girlfriends and was blessed by a retreat with my senior girls, and we celebrated Doug with basketball, yummy food and a date night. We had first time sleepovers, we had colds, we made memories with friends, we watched good basketball, we wished for more sunshine. 

While I would stay in March (minus the rain), I am looking forward to the next month. Glancing at the calendar, it promises to be a good one. It also promises to go by even faster than the last. So here I am again. The hurry up, the stay right here. Pretty soon I will be wondering where April went, but I sincerely promise to enjoy it.