My Little Boy in Blue + Some Mom Thoughts + A Little Prayer

The little outfit Auggie has on is just too precious. The reason I really love it is because it was his Daddy's. Amazing to think that Sue's baby boy is 26 years old and now his baby boy is 6 weeks old. Let me let that sink in. 6 weeks old. Strangers that see me with my kiddos tell me all the time how quickly time flies: "My kids are all grown up but I remember when they were that little....enjoy them....it will go by so fast." When these parents tell me this, their faces tell the true story. The story of love and joy and pride....and of longing. Longing to maybe go back to the times of little fingers and tiny smiles one more time. 

At 6 weeks old, my little newborn is not so new or so little anymore. It feels like over night he has grown so much. He has started to smile and try to talk back. The first jammies he ever wore are honestly too small. I already feel that longing to go back. Back to the first time I held him. Back to the first time I kissed his little cheek.

It's funny. I love the stage Emery is in so much that sometimes, when August is crying or up at 3 am, I think "Boy, I cannot wait for you to be two." And in that same 24 hours, when Emery is too busy for a kiss or to sit on my lap (or is being a little bit too sassy) I think, "I miss her being that small....I want my baby girl back." Its like I want time to hurry up and slow down. What I really really need to concentrate on is just enjoying. I need to relax and enjoy August as he grows from a newborn to a bouncing baby and I need to enjoy Emery as she learns a million things a day. Some day I will be like those strangers and long for this time again.... so I guess I better not miss it the first time.
 

That is one reason I love my blog. I can go back and remember things with just a click of a button. At night, when I am up feeding August, I like to go back and see what Emery was doing at this stage. I realized the other night that in just a few quick clicks, I can read Emery's entire life story. Which only made me realize that in a few more clicks, August will be two. That is kind of what life is if you think about it. We are blessed with just a few clicks here. But by the grace of God we get an eternity of clicks with him and our loved ones. The first verse I ever learned reminds me of this comfort.

John 3:16: For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him shall not perish but have everlasting life.

If I sound a bit mushy today, it is because I am. I was reminded by a best friend this week of how truly blessed I am. It is so easy to take our time here on earth for granted....and if I am being honest, it is easy as a worn out Mommy to take my littles for granted. When they are crying or not listening and I don't know what to do, I fall prey to being frustrated and ungrateful. I have laid with my head on my pillow at night thinking about the dishes that I didn't get done or Emery's tantrum earlier in the evening....instead of praising God for a full day of health and love and thanking him for sending me my greatest blessings. I need to work on this.

This week I have made an effort to notice my kid's wiggly toes, smiles, big blue eyes, and their touch and smell (which is sooo the best...I wish I could bottle it.) I want to experience and remember these moments and feelings forever. So when the time comes and I am the one longing to go back to the past for a second, I can. When this time does come, I hope that I am remembering to thank God for the entire journey...not just the past...because I know such good times are to come.

Today I would like to lift those who are longing to feel these little moments for the first time up in prayer. Today I want to remember those who are longing to go back to the past because of a loss...the past might be where they feel their loved ones the most. I pray for the future and for God's plan and for happiness and I thank him for putting these people in my life. People who have taught me such important life lessons.
Amen.